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Title - Beyond Vanilla: What the BDSM & Kink Community Can Teach Us About Consent
Speaker - Heather Woodford, licensed clinical social worker, certified sex educator
Location - Teneral Cellars Tasting Room & Wine Lounge
Details:
We all want our sensual relationships to be mutually satisfying, and fueled by excellent communication, pleasure, curiosity, and growth. But what does that actually look like? How do we get there, especially if we want to experiment and explore? Heather Woodford is a licensed clinical social worker and a certified sex educator who has worked with kinky, queer, and nonmonogamous communities since 2012. In this lecture she’s going to explain everything she wants “vanilla” people to understand about consent, and how to build a trusting, mutually satisfying, sensual relationship whether it’s within or outside of the traditional lines of monogamy.
Misconceptions about BDSM, kink, and the leather community have given many folks the impression that kink is dark, seedy, and scary. However, when it's done well, this context is incredibly rich for uplevelling consent and communication skills around sex, touch, connection, and relationships. You’ll walk away from this lecture with a deeper understanding how communication and consent can take your relationships to the next level.
Some of the questions Heather will answer in this lecture include:
- What even is the difference between leather, BDSM, and kink?
- Where is the line between kink and vanilla? (Spoiler: there are many answers to this - and it might even be the wrong question to ask!)
- How do I figure out what I like (whether it's considered "kinky" or not)?
- How do I start (and survive!) conversations around this vulnerable and potentially awkward topic?
- Are these skills useful in non-kink or non-sex contexts? (Spoiler: yes)
- Will my partner respect me if I share my desires?
- Can fantasy play a role in my sex life?
- What about some of the risks? Is kink scary?
- What about power dynamics?
- How do I find more support, resources and community?
Heather Woodford is a licensed clinical social worker and a certified sex educator working with kinky, queer and nonmonogamous communities since 2012. She founded "Sex Positive Sacramento", served as a lecturer at Sacramento State University’s School for Social Work for nine years, and is currently a therapist in private practice in Sacramento. She believes that everyone deserves life-long sex and relationship education, and looks forward to cross-pollinating your brains with wisdom from her work with these communities.
Teneral Cellars Tasting Room & Wine Lounge is located in Midtown Sacramento at 1050 20th St #110, 95811. This lecture is presented as part of Teneral's pride month programming. Teneral is a queer-owned, women-owned wine tasting room that prides itself on being a community gathering place, and a safe space for everyone. They serve their award winning wines as well as food from their neighbor, Omakase Por Favor.
All Common Knowledge events are 21+
Schedule:
6pm - Doors Open - grab a drink and mingle. We'll have trivia questions on the screen and some surprises
6:45pm - Program begins with an intro & prize giveaway
7pm - Lecture begins
7:45pm - Q&A
8pm - Mingle, discuss the lecture, meet the speaker
9pm - You don't have to go home, but you can't stay here
What to Expect:
Common Knowledge is Sacramento's new bar lecture series.
At Common Knowledge we believe that learning something new is the most rewarding and fun thing you can do. We're about bringing diverse people and ideas together to have a great time.
This event is open seating so come at 6pm to to grab a drink and a seat. Before the lecture we'll have music and trivia questions on the screen. We'll also have a fun, low pressure "side quest" so you can win a free drink.
The lecture will last for 45 minutes and are made for an intelligent, general audience so you don't need any science background to have a great time. After the lecture, there will be 15 minutes for Q&A and then the bar will be open for another hour to hang out, meet the speaker, and discuss the ideas you just heard.
The bar will close at 9pm.
Parking:
Teneral is located In the iconic MARRS Bldg. on 20th Street between J & K. There is street parking as well as parking lots nearby.
Policies:
All Common Knowledge events are 21+
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